Knowing yourself takes awhile to develop. There are so many phases to go through with growing pains along the way. But when you get to the point where you are in tuned with that little inner voice, you then know that your choices, indiscretions, and mistakes brought you to the contentment of your present being. -SD
I think the first time I knew who I was in 2005. Sometimes you must have your spirit supressed for you to emerge as your true self. I had just come out of a situation and I felt like this was the first time I could breathe in a long time. People who saw me 6 months prior noticed the change in my spirit immediately. I knew what I wanted and that passion inside has continued to flourish over the years.
As a woman, you are challenged on a constant basis about your thoughts, wants, and desires. If you come off too strong, you’re considered a bitch or overly emotional and aggressive and if you are too lenient, you’re overlooked or your capabilities are doubted. We are consistently on a balancing beam. Although this may be the case in some circumstances, I always feel everyone needs to be true to their selves. If you’re emotional then be emotional. No one should be able to dictate your moods or your passion. Men and women were created different for a reason.
Too many times people change their innate thoughts to please others. We are put on this earth to live our own lives. If we disagree, we disagree! Things can always be discussed and worked out; just don’t cower and compromise yourself or your values. Socially, women tend to be the pleasers and are the ones that are forced to bend or take the lesser in situations. I’ve been considered a bitch or unreasonable in several instances but I didn’t give a f*ck because my heart and spirit said I was right. If I wasn’t going to be true to my feelings it would have eaten me up on the inside. I’m not saying to be a stark raving maniac or unreasonable but holding your tongue because of insecurities will never gain you respect or confidence.
It took a minute for me to be so sure of myself and, as human beings, we will still have our doubts. However there is a voice inside you that will never deny your truth; the truth to who you are and the truth to what you deserve. There will be learning curves and growing pains along the way. Just take heed but live for yourself and not others.