Friends are so important to the evolution of who you are. As I look back on time, there are friends that I have lost along the way that I regret. We may have grown apart or they may have hurt my feelings by an action and  it was hard for me to get past and rebuild. Maybe it was due to my lack of maturity or maybe it seemed at that time unforgivable because the trust was broken. I have like 4 or 5 people (guys and girls) who I am not friends with to this day but I love them the same from the last time we spoke.

 As I’ve matured I’ve realized things aren’t perfect and people make mistakes but love is love. It is constantly changing and constantly needs to be worked on. Misunderstandings happen and just because someone disappointed you it doesn’t mean they don’t deserve a second chance to make it right. Everyone makes mistakes for different reasons and most of the mistakes are made from people’s insecurities. Sometimes women are quick to forgive a man for his insecurities but aren’t quick to forgive a woman for hers. The love isn’t stronger. The man/woman relationship may be more intense and seem stronger but losing your friend in the long run will hurt the deepest.

I have one girlfriend who has defied the test of time for me. She never gave up on our friendship and she forces me to see that our love can stand the test of time. She has hurt me in the past and vice versa. She has been more emotional about her hurt, but my hurt from her has hurt me all the same. I’m one of those girls that have very close male friends and I realized why. Even though they are my rocks, they don’t make me tap into my emotional side as much. We look at things very logical and figure out all my problems from that perspective. My girlfriends make me delve into that part which makes me feel uncomfortable and weak. Being weak is the worse feeling for me. However, as I’m learning, there is nothing wrong with that. If we come from a position of strength all the time, how can we work on our weaknesses?

 Deepak Chopra says that the people  in our lives today are a reflection of who we are. Throwing away a friendship on a petty misunderstanding isn’t worth the loss. We all change and go through our tribulations and sometimes we make not like our friend’s trials and tribulations. It doesn’t mean we abandon them or judge them for their choices. For example, that relationship he/she is in may not be conducive to you having a healthy friendship with him/her at this time, but maybe there is a lesson he/she has to learn from that. Step aside and let your friend live her life! If your love is true, whether it survives or not, your love should stay the same. Sometimes we get too caught up in the situation being about ourselves. Life happens. Circumstances happen. And we learn and grow from it all.

Your friends are a part of you. When one is lost, you have lost a part of you. You have lost love. So don’t hastily discard it because of ego, disappointment, or circumstances. Stay true to the bond and the foundation will only be strengthened.